Thursday, May 7, 2009

Modesty tips!

My mother has always been big on modesty, so naturally, she had us dress modestly. Then, I hit about 14, and began wondering, "Why?" Why dress modestly? What is the point? Not that I didn't want to dress modestly... I just wanted to know why.

Well, my mother, being a smart mother, bought the book "Secret Keeper" by Dannah Gresh. In that book, I learned how immodesty affects a guy's mind, whether he wants it to or not. After the initial thoughts, of course, he can chose to entertain those thoughts or throw them out. I learned many other things, as well. She has a test that is helpful. You can see the test here: It looks a bit young, but the tests are still helpful. :)

So... a few tips that I've learned about modesty:

  1. Have you ever bought an undershirt, and then found out that it did not come up high enough to be of much use? Well, I have. One day, I finally had the brilliant idea to wear it backwards. I know it sounds weird, but it works! And you usually can't tell that it is backwards.
  2. Ask your Dad if you have any doubts on whether you should wear something
  3. When you wear a shirt that is button down, it is a good idea to wear an undershirt underneath. Why? Because when you are in certain positions, the holes gap open and people can see in. So, unless that is something you want, you may want to put on that undershirt. :)
  4. Safety pins!
  5. Often, when we stand in front of the mirror, everything looks great... But raise your arms, sit down cross legged, bend over... and some nasty things can happen. Make sure you are aware of what happens when you move!
  6. When you wear a skirt...
  7. If you don't want people seeing up it when you sit down, it's a good idea to have it fall below the knee. A few inches below is best.
  8. It is good to wear a "slip" underneath to prevent it from becoming see through.
  9. If you are going to be active while wearing one, you should obviously wear shorts underneath!
  10. Really tight skirts are probably not a good idea... they make moving difficult, for one thing, and also, they clearly outline, well, your backside. Not the best idea. :)
  11. When you swim...
  12. Well, I'm sure you all know this, but if you wear a white shirt over a swimsuit, it's not really going to help. :)
  13. Probably the more modest and least expensive swim attire is a swimsuit with a dark t-shirt and longer shorts over it. (see the modesty survey)

If you are really interested in modesty, I recommend going to Seriously, you must go there! It is a bunch of guys who are answered some of our questions about modesty. Very, very good!!

It can be a bit confusing at first, so I recommend looking at it like this:

First, look at the modesty petition.

Then, read how to read the results of the survey.

Next look at some of the really encouraging posts, such as: "Guys notice whether girls dress modestly or not", "Modesty is an important quality for your future wife to have" and "Despite rampant immodesty all around us, girls who choose to dress modestly do make a difference."

After that look at whatever topics interest you!

I hope this post made sense, and that you can find something useful here. I am very visual, meaning that I can sometimes get an idea of how clothes would affect a guy. So this is a big deal to me. :) I don't feel that everyone should dress like I do or anything (I wear dresses daily!), but I just want to encourage girls to dress modestly. And guys! :)


  1. Dear Miss Carissa,

    Modesty is very important in our family as well.

    I found your blog through the What’s Next?? blog. I, too, will continue to stay at home after graduating from homeschool highschool. I was glad to see someone giving that perspective.

    It was funny to see your movie list. We have seen almost all of those movies :). Do Hard Things and Before You Meet Prince Charming are in my top list of books. I think So Much More by Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin is really good as well.

    In your list, you mentioned writing; what kind of writing do you enjoy doing?

    How much Japanese have you learned so far? I am learning Thai (my mom is Chinese but was born and raised in Thailand and both of my parents know Thai).

    Your sister in Christ,
    Alyssa (My writing blog. It doesn’t have much on it yet; I hope to add more soon :)) Disclaimer: Ever since we moved, Modesty and More has been under some "heavy" construction; please still feel free to look around. If you see something you want to buy, I'll do some quick checking to see if it's still available :). Thank you so much for your patience!

  2. Hi Alyssa!

    Thank you so much for your sweet comment! I did look at your blog, and I will comment properly soon. We are getting ready to leave later on today for a homeschool convention, so we are quite busy. I just wanted let you know that read your comment! :)

    God bless,